Well, truth to tell, Henry David Thoreau didn’t really chronicle about all of the realities (and responsibilities) of his life — he hardly mentioned how much his friends supported him financially. Case in point: he wrote the wonderful essay “On Civil Disobediance” and was jailed for not paying taxes (which would have gone to the Mexican-American war effort at that time). Yes, he went to jail for his beliefs, but he didn’t stay there long because he was bailed out by friends.
The only reason I bring this up is because one of the financial realities in my life slapped me in the face last week — my 1993 Honda Civic had to be repaired yet again. I bought this car for $1,200 last September. It was to be a vehicle used to get around the sprawling areas of Berkshire County and beyond so that I could increase my accessibility. I lived in Los Angeles, and my last few years there I lived without a car – I was fortunate to have lived in a “walkable” neighborhood and, since a subway system had been created, I was virtually unhindered by the lack of a vehicle. It’s different in the Berkshires!
When I first moved here, I lived in the tiny burg of Savoy. It was fine at first because I was living at a healing sanctuary/retreat center where I could isolate and insulate myself from the world. (Since I have bipolar disorder & PTSD and had had a serious breakdown in Los Angeles, I needed some time to repair my body, mind & spirit in a relatively radical way.) As I began slowly healing, I was able to make friends with neighbors, avail myself to social services, and get back to the rhythm of modern life. One friend/neighbor worked in North Adams once a week, so I was able to get a ride from her into town for appointments and shopping. Since I had limited funds (I was living on welfare & food stamps) and I wanted to respect the holistic, vegetarian standards of the healing sanctuary, I bought foods that I could create meals from scratch. It was a wonderful experience to have kept within a limited budget and cook for myself… I’m trying to get back to that way of life now.
Anyway, it wasn’t until I connected with other members of my Buddhist organization that I felt the necessity of a car. Not only are there very few members here in Western Massachusetts (in L.A. I could walk a couple of blocks to members’ houses in my neighborhood), but they were spread far & wide. In my year at the healing center several SGI-USA members came to chant with me and picked me up for meetings. The steward of the healing sanctuary even supported my Buddhist practice by allowing me to have discussion meetings at the retreat house. However, it was not enough for me to be a truly active member. You see, discussion meetings in members’ homes and a monthly meeting for the sake of World Peace are at the heart of SGI activities. It’s an opportunity for members to pray & study together and encourage each other in faith. I wanted a car so that I could be an active participant again.
I moved to North Adams in July 2005 and could utilize the services of the Berkshire Regional Transit Authority. Although those services are quite limited, it was better than nothing, which was what I had had. Last year, feeling more capable to expand my life, I got my MA driver’s license and bought a car. You really do need a car here, not only for the reasons aforementioned, but because of the elements as well. It was rather challenging in the winter to walk around town, walk the 2 miles to school and back, and travel by buses. Besides, the real reason for getting a car, as I said before, was to become a fully active participant in the SGI Buddhist movement here.
So I got the car from a very nice woman, who had even kept repair records during the time she owned the vehicle. Of course, my goal in owning a Honda was to be able to keep the car for as long as possible. Unfortunately, I have had to put about $2,000 worth of work on my car in order to do so. I’m beginning to realize that the previous owner put a rather bare minimum of effort & money to keep the car running, and may have gotten the car serviced at less than adequate repair shops (as substantiated by a friend who knows the reputations of local auto mechanics). So since purchasing my car, I have spent the equivalent of its Blue Book value to improve the condition so that I can keep it running.
I’m not complaining, mind you. This is just one of the many realities of modern life… and because of the area and way in which I live, having a car enables me to support my lifestyle. Fortunately I do have a decent mechanic (recommended by my friend) and I had the money in savings to pay for the most recent repair. The reality of my personality/character is that I do not have experience maintaining cars! I ran several cars into the ground in L.A. by not maintaining them. I guess this is a major challenge for me — living deliberately extends to my car too!
